Back to reality



2016-08-20 12.32.56

Well, after a lovely “almost” week in Gotland it was time to face reality again. Back to work.

And first thing that happens, I get sick! First I just thought it was just stress and anxiety of being back in the work-environment again, but I had to realise pretty quickly that I had caught a bug. No details, but my tummy went topsy-turvy and I had no fever and no vomiting. But I was so sick, and felt extremely sorry for myself.

I stayed home for two days, then I just HAD to get back to work for some important things, but I lasted half a day on Thursday. I wasn’t really sick anymore by then, but I had no energy and thought I´d faint half the time. So I brought my stuff home (I´m lucky that way, I can work at home occasionally) and today, Sunday, I feel ok again. Finally! It has been a long time since I was that sick. Actually I had the flu in March 2015 and that was horrible… Maybe illness just takes a stronger hold on you as you get older? In that case, getting older has it downsides…

But now I´m fine again I´m continuing my project this autumn – which is to find greater harmony and balance.

To do that I intend to do different things. I want to create the home I want and finally fix those things I just left when I moved so quickly last year, I want to declutter my life and get rid of some negativity in my life, I want to expand myself and meet some new people and do interesting things and I want to put some effort into feeling better physically.

I dont pretend that I want to look like a 20 year old, but I want to be healthy and strong and feel my best. Last year I cut down on alcohol, and now I´m seriously considering cutting it out entirely. Who really needs it? I´ve never been a big drinker, but I felt that over a period of time drinking alcohol with a meal or a party became more a social norm than something I actually choose. So I decided to cut it back to those occasions when I really wanted to celebrate. Because I rarely drink these days I can actually feel the effect from one glas of champagne these days, and it makes me think of the effect alcohol has on my body and brain. I may be a bit out of line, but I´m thinking of my mom who had Alzheimers and drank way too much at times and how that may have speeded her disease. Having seen that disease up and close I´m gonna do my damnedest to avoid it, and if giving up a cold beer or a glas of champagne once every two-three weeks is the way to do it, I´m in.

But of course I know that isn´t all – I´ve lost 20 pounds this last year from giving up alcohol more or less, but I´m still 20 pounds from where I want to be. So I´m gonna try out some new ways of eating (not diet!!!don´t believe in them) and try and find a way I can live with for the long haul. And I´m going back to the gym and walking. Nothing rabid, just enough to feel good. And the same goes for the yoga. I love that but have a problem finding a routine in my practice.

I love August, because it´s the mix of summer and autumn, the month when things bloom and still you can feel things are changing. The air is crisper and leaves and flowers slowly change colors and goes to rest. It´s also the time of year when I make a hundred plans for the year to come, usually ending up having to cancel half of them because my energy levels drop the way the plants on my balcony do…

But I´ve bought some tickets to concerts and theatre-performances and I´m going to do an on-line University course in literature, so I have big hopes for the next few months! They are going to be fun:)

Do you make plans in August and what are they?